Announcing the No-Cloud Needed™ License

It's easy to take for granted that our devices rely on cloud services to function. From smart home gadgets that need cloud access to turn on, to products you thought you owned becoming useless if the creator decides to charge a monthly fee, often hidden on page 50 of the Terms of Service you never read.

That's why I'm proud to introduce the No-Cloud Needed™ License. This is a commitment to consumers. I believe that when you buy a product, its core functionality should be yours, forever, without hidden dependencies or forced online connections.

From User Control to the "Internet of Shit"

Think back just 15 years ago. Anyone could buy a cheap consumer webcam that was simple yet powerful. You could upload images directly to any SFTP server you chose, and modify all its settings via a basic website hosted right on the camera, accessible via your local network. You could even rotate the camera remotely if you made it accessible from the internet, all without ever needing permission from a third party.

Today, the trend has reversed. The most popular cameras require a proprietary app from the manufacturer and often only allow uploads to their own paid cloud service. Even basic tasks, like viewing data stored on the camera's SD card, require their cloud and their app, locking you into a walled garden where you have little to no control. This is the "Internet of Shit" in action, devices that work for the company, not for you. The No-Cloud Needed™ License is a rebellion against this trend.

Why the No-Cloud Needed™ License is Needed

The No-Cloud Needed™ License addresses critical pain points in today's tech landscape:

  • Reliability: Products certified with the No-Cloud Needed™ mark are guaranteed to work even if your internet goes down, a remote server fails, or a cloud service is discontinued. Your essential features remain fully operational.
  • Ownership: No more subscriptions for features you thought you owned! This license ensures that a product's primary functions do not require ongoing payments beyond the initial purchase price.
  • Privacy: With an emphasis on local control and data portability, the license provides an assurance that you can maintain greater control over your data, choosing where and how it's stored.
  • Longevity: You invest in products expecting them to last. This certification helps protect against obsolescence due to a manufacturer's change in cloud strategy.
  • Transparency: Products displaying the No-Cloud Needed™ mark clearly state their commitment to these principles, offering consumers peace of mind and informed choices.

I believe these terms create a powerful new standard for product transparency. I'm soliciting feedback on the terms of this draft license. Please review the document below and share your thoughts to help me refine this important consumer protection tool.

The No-Cloud Needed™ License

No-Cloud Needed Logo

No-Cloud Needed™ License - Version 0.1 (Draft)

This document grants the right to use the No-Cloud Needed™ logo and trademark. By using them, you agree to all of the terms below.

1. Grant of Rights

You are granted a worldwide, royalty-free, and non-exclusive license to use the No-Cloud Needed™ logo and trademark on your product(s) and in all related marketing, packaging, and digital materials.

2. Certification Standards

To use this mark, your product must meet all of the following requirements:

  • Standalone Functionality: The product's advertised features must be fully operational without reliance on a cloud service, whether it is provided by the licensee or a third party. The product must continue to be fully functional even if the licensee discontinues any of their cloud offerings.
  • Local Control: If a companion app is used to control the product, the app must be able to connect directly to the device via a local protocol, such as Bluetooth, Wi-Fi LAN, or a wired connection.
  • Data Portability: If a product's bona fide feature is to upload user-generated data (e.g., videos, documents, sensor readings) to a remote server, it must be compatible with a standard protocol (e.g., SFTP, WebDAV) and allow the user to choose their own server.
  • No Recurring Payments: The product's primary functions must not require a future subscription, recurring fee, or any other payment to the licensee beyond the initial purchase price to remain operational.
  • Self-Contained Software: Any software required to operate the product must either be included with the product or be freely available under a license that allows for full, permanent use and transfer, without any additional payment.
  • Optional Cloud Features: A product may include optional cloud-based features, provided they are clearly separate from and not required for the product's standalone, advertised functionality. The product must remain fully functional for its primary purpose when the cloud feature is disabled or not used.

3. Conditions of Use

You must place the No-Cloud Needed™ mark only on products that comply with all of the standards above. You must not use the mark in a way that suggests endorsement or certification of any product that does not meet these standards. You must include a copy of this license with the product and on its website to inform consumers of the terms of this certification.

4. Consequences of Non-Compliance and Limitation of Liability

For the Licensee: Any use of the No-Cloud Needed™ mark on a product that does not comply with these conditions automatically and immediately terminates your license. In addition, you agree to pay a liquidated damages penalty of $1,000,000 for each instance of non-compliant use of the mark. This is a pre-agreed-upon amount to compensate the Licensor for damages, including brand dilution and legal fees. Furthermore, if the Licensee violates the terms of this agreement, anyone who owns the product is entitled to a full refund and all legal fees needed to collect that refund.

For the Licensor: The Licensor is not liable for any damages that may arise from the use of the No-Cloud Needed™ mark or the related license. IN NO EVENT SHALL THE LICENSOR BE LIABLE TO THE LICENSEE OR ANY THIRD PARTY FOR ANY DIRECT, INDIRECT, INCIDENTAL, SPECIAL, EXEMPLARY, OR CONSEQUENTIAL DAMAGES, including but not limited to lost data, lost profits, or costs of procurement of substitute goods or services, arising out of or in connection with this license or the use of the No-Cloud Needed™ mark.

5. No Warranty

THE NO-CLOUD NEEDED™ LOGO AND TRADEMARK ARE PROVIDED "AS IS." THE LICENSOR DISCLAIMS ALL WARRANTIES, WHETHER EXPRESS, IMPLIED, STATUTORY, OR OTHERWISE, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO ANY IMPLIED WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY, FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE, OR NON-INFRINGEMENT.